A Teddy Lupin Christmas
by mischief manage
Summary: Teddy Lupin Reflects on his thoughts and feelings towards his parents during Christmas. Sonfic A Thousand Miles by Vanessa Carlton. Oneshot


**A/N: This is going to be my version of a Harry Potter Christmas special. This is also a songfic. The song is "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton. Enjoy:D**

_Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces pass  
And I'm home bound  
_

Teddy Lupin sat there with his hot chocolate in one hand with the other wrapping a blanket tightly around his cold body. He sat and watched Hermione trying to teach Rose to walk and Ron bouncing Hugo up and down on his knee. He watched his best friend, Victoire, being lifted onto her father's shoulders as Fleur laughed. He smiled at the Potters who were gazing down at their children with love in their happy eyes. All the other adults were laughing at a joke that George told them. This was his family.

Wait, scratch that, this wasn't _his _family, his family was gone…

_  
Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making a way  
Through the crowd_

He wished with all his might that his parents would give him a piggy back ride, or look at him with such love in their eyes. Not once has he ever spent a Christmas with his parents. He missed them so much. He wanted them…he _needed _them.

And I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder... 

A tear swelled up in his eyes and dropped silently into his hot chocolate. He got all that he asked for Christmas…but what he wanted most in the world was his parents. He wanted to tell them that he loved them.

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight 

Teddy would do anything just to say a few words to them. He loved the Weasleys and the Potters but he loved his parents so much more. Even if he could barely remember them.

It's always times like these  
When I think of you  
And I wonder  
If you ever  
Think of me 

There would be times when Teddy thought about whether or not his parents ever thought about him in heaven. He wondered if he was the last thing they thought of before they died. Even though no on would know these answers for sure, he still wondered.

'Cause everything's so wrong  
And I don't belong  
Living in your  
Precious memories 

He can't stand watching his cousins and friends playing and talking to their parents. It feels wrong to him that he doesn't have any. He can't stand it even more when people compare him his parents. It's like he's his parent's living memory.

'Cause I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder... 

Yet again, more tears fell making his drink taste bitter.

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight 

He knew he had Harry and grandmum, but he still wants his own parents. His own parents to talk to, his own parents to hug…For a long time now, he felt out of place. _parents..._

And I, I  
Don't want to let you know  
I, I  
Drown in your memory  
I, I  
Don't want to let this go  
I, I  
Don't...  


If he could see his parents just for a few minutes. He'd tell them about his whole life. He wouldn't care that they'd probably wouldn't understand him. He would only care that they were there; living and breathing.

_  
Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces pass  
And I'm home bound_

He has never really like talking about his parents to anyone but himself. Every time someone talks about them he listens with great interest. He just never joins in the conversation much.

Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making a way  
Through the crowd 

Teddy starred at the watch that Harry had given him for Christmas and wished that he could turn back time.

And I still need you  
And I still miss you  
And now I wonder... 

He thought he was going to puke in agony once he saw Ron whisper in Hugo ear making him laugh. His hair turned a dull shade of brown.

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass us by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you... 

He never enjoyed family gatherings as much as he should. He didn't know why he was there, he never fully considered himself family.

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
If I could  
Just hold you  
Tonight 

He hugged his blanket really close to his body and pretended to be hugging his parents. As he shut his eyes and tried to remember what his parents smelled of, James escaped from Harry's grasp and walked up to Teddy. Harry smiled at him and surprising enough, he smiled back.

_We love you Teddy…._


End file.
